Showing posts with label right attitude. Show all posts
Showing posts with label right attitude. Show all posts

Sunday, 20 May 2018

How I Conquered Self-Doubt and How You Can Too

How I Conquered Self-Doubt and How You Can Too

self-doubt
Ever since I was a child I struggled with self-doubt. That feeling that you aren’t good enough, that you can’t accomplish anything, that you’ll never be successful or happy. I wrestled with that feeling every day, trying desperately to not let it overwhelm me. Yet try as I might to avoid these thoughts I could hardly escape them. You see I was a dreamer. I would tell anyone who would listen all of my big hopes and dreams, my greatest aspirations, only to be met with cynicism and criticism. My teachers, my elders, my peers, would bombard me with phrases like “you need to be realistic”, “you’ll never be successful doing that” and “you aren’t capable of achieving that”.
Naturally, over time, these phrases eroded away what little sense of self-confidence I had. I tried not to become so easily dissuaded but their cold remarks and rebukes truly crushed me. It came to the point that whenever I tried to pursue a goal or a dream, I mentally defeated myself before I ever even began. Thoughts like: “you aren’t meant to be successful”, “you’re not good enough” and “why do I even bother” raced to the forefront of my mind, dashing any sense of hope with vicious immediacy. I felt hopeless and in my mind I was hopeless. In my mind, I was nothing more than a mere casualty in the war against self-doubt.
Because I felt I was succumbing to the negative thoughts that permeated my consciousness I became ashamed. Which of course exacerbated the feelings of worthlessness I had already developed. It was as if every time I failed to start something, every time I failed to pursue my goals, those feelings washed over me like a wave. A wave that came crashing down the moment I began to build up some semblance of self-confidence. Negative thoughts became a mainstay in my head. They had moved in and taken up residence. Unfortunately, for me, my brain was never all that adept at making evictions.
Meanwhile, I would see others around me succeeding. going to college, graduating college, becoming gainfully employed, and I resented them. I loathed them. And I loathed myself because of my inability to attain what they had. All I wanted was to be considered a success and yet I never even gave myself a real shot at it. Before long my defeatist attitude manifested into self-destructive behavior. I stopped going to school, I stopped showing up to my job, I blocked every positive influence out of my life. The downward spiral continued.
Until one day, I’m not sure what sparked it, but for whatever reason, I woke up and decided enough was enough. From that day going forward I decided I was going to change my life. I was so tired of looking at myself in the mirror and feeling disgusted at what I saw. I was so tired of talking down to myself. I was sick and tired of hating who I was. So I set out to wage war on the voice inside my head. I was going to do battle with my self-esteem and goddamnit I was going to win this civil war. Finally, The voice that for years was powered by the admonishments and condescending remarks made by myself, teachers, elders, and contemporaries would finally be silenced. I was on a mission.
I started by focusing on gaining little victories. I felt that if I could just remain positive while accomplishing little tasks then that would somehow eventually allow me to build confidence and remain positive when faced with larger challenges. So I made sure I woke up at 6:00 am every day. I made sure I worked out and exercised every day. I made sure I engaged in healthy behaviors as opposed to self-destructive ones.
Essentially, I began to organize my life. I showed up on time to work every day and doubled my output. I made sure my car was clean, my room was clean, I began to take pride in my possessions and in keeping things orderly. This taught me how to take pride in myself. As time went on I was getting in increasingly better shape through my renewed dedication to exercise, I was performing better at my job, and most importantly I felt more confident. I finally felt capable and in control.
To help myself stay on track (and keep the negative thoughts on the defensive) I bombarded my brain with positivity. Every day I would write down a list of the positive attributes and redeemable qualities I had. I would also write down everything I had accomplished that day in accordance with goals I had set. Which forced me to be accountable. As I achieved more and more  I felt incredibly capable —  like I truly had the ability to accomplish anything. The voice was still there. The self-doubt still existed. But I was driving it back, forcing it to retreat as I gained ground.
As my newfound confidence grew I looked at my goals and modified them. I wanted to set them as high as possible. I completely changed my attitude and my perspective. Now, anything was achievable. I kept encouraging myself and the little victories were piling up. I was losing weight, making new friends, smiling more, and remaining disciplined. To me, these little victories represented immense hope. The hope that these seemingly inconsequential insignificant victories would one day translate into me becoming financially, personally, and professionally successful.
Fortunately, that’s just what happened. I parlayed my newfound work ethic, discipline, and positive attitude into starting my own successful company. I have a beautiful girlfriend and loving friends, I am living a dream that seemed so far beyond the realm of possibility just a few years ago.  All because I was able to change the narrative in my head. I went from hating myself and thinking negatively about myself to loving and accepting who I am and thinking positively.
I hope this post can encourage you to remain positive and fight the good fight against self-doubt. For anyone wondering the most significant changes I made were as follows:
  • I learned how to accept myself for who I am as an individual instead of trying to fight it.
  • I learned how to accomplish little manageable tasks to build my self-confidence.
  • I discovered the benefits of positive self-talk. I simply kept referring to myself in a positive manner even when faced with negativity. It did wonders for my self-esteem.
  • I started to believe in myself and my capabilities. I stopped listening to what other people had to say about me. They weren’t me. I am in control of what I do with my life Not other people.
  • I never quit. I decided to make a change and I stuck to it. I did everything in my power to accomplish my goal and view myself and my abilities in a positive light.
  • Most importantly I learned how to appreciate and love who I am.
Have you or are you struggling with self-doubt? If so, just know, you will beat it. I have faith in you, now it’s time for you to have faith in you.
by  

Friday, 18 May 2018

From NFL Football Star to Yoga Fanatic

From NFL Football Star to Yoga Fanatic

Yoga
“Yoga is about clearing away whatever it is in us that prevents us from living in the most full and whole way.” – Cybele Tomlinson
When I was eight, my father signed me up for a football competition called Punt, Pass, and Kick. Over 50 kids entered, mostly 9 and 10 year old’s who in my eyes looked old enough to sport mustaches. But thanks to a kick that outdistanced the others by an easy margin, I came in third place. After that, I was hooked on kicking footballs. I spent countless hours at the field near my house, kicking some nights until the sun went down and other days when two feet of snow covered the field.
Soon I was playing Division I football at the University of Pittsburgh. During the off season, I’d spend 4-5 hours a day kicking 100 balls at a time and the rest of my day lifting, jogging, and sprinting. I took my “kicking notebook” to the field, where I’d write down how many kicks I’d done and from which distance, as if solving some sort of mysterious math problem. No matter how tired my leg got or how much pain I felt, I didn’t stop until I hit my goal number.
When you kick a football, you repeat the same motion every time. It creates amazing torque in your back and hips. During my senior year, I started to feel pain in my low back and hip flexors. I went to see a chiropractor, and the trainers gave me Flexerill to manage the muscle spasms. But instead of resting, I added wind sprints, hills, and steps to my regime. I started to have literal pain in my ass and shooting pains down my leg. Sometimes I had to crawl on my hands and knees to make it to the bathroom. Yet I slugged through the pain for the entire year. At the end of it, I led the nation in field goal percentage at 83%, at one point making twelve in a row.
I managed to gain the attention of several NFL scouts.  I signed a contract with the Detroit Lions but I was cut before the season began, when my tired leg failed me. Then I signed with the Indianapolis Colts and again was cut when my strained hip flexors couldn’t survive camp. And then came the New York Jets. After a day of kicking in which I struggled to land the ball in the end zone, I decided it was time to talk to someone. I knew if I showed the team doctor my injury, the Jets would cut me. But I was low on options.
I explained my history of back, leg and hip pain, and the doctor went through a series of strength tests. When he asked me to lift his hand with my right leg, I felt like I had nothing to give.
Then he examined my hip flexors. The hip flexor is at the very top of the thigh, where it connects to the hip. He dug into the left, and everything seemed fine after just a few seconds of poking around. He started in on my right side. A few seconds turned into a minute.
“I’m having a hard time finding your right hip flexor muscle,” he said.
My heart sank.
“I’m afraid that your hip flexor has completely degenerated from overuse.”
Game over. I’d always heard the players’ saying that NFL stands for “Not For Long.” In my case, they were right.
I knew it was over, but I felt lost. I flew back to Pittsburgh kicking myself for destroying my body. I was angry, upset that I’d disappointed myself, the Jets, my parents, my wife Karen, and my daughter, Sadie. I was depressed, too, by how my body felt. For years I was a top athlete. Now my body was broken, and nothing made it better: no pill, no amount of rest. Even the chiropractor offered only temporary relief. I needed something else. But what?
Karen had been suggesting yoga for years. Finally her enthusiasm caught on, and I decided that instead of doing my normal weight routine I would try Karen’s classes once a week.
My need to push myself to the limit made yoga really tough at first. I’d get frustrated when I struggled with a pose. My body ached. I was stiff as a board. I didn’t realize until then how injured I was and how limited my mobility had become. In frustration I cursed my body. I hated yoga because I thought it was too hard. But it wasn’t that the practice was hard; I was just trying too hard. It was me.
After a while, something clicked. First I started breathing. Karen had reminded us to breathe, but I hadn’t been listening. Once I was breathing, I also tuned in to other signals. I’d only go into a pose to the point where my body told me to stop. After class, instead of feeling beat up, I felt strong, light, and rejuvenated.
I got the yoga bug. Once a week grew to twice, then three times a week. My muscle spasms and back pain, which had been happening four or five times a day, dwindled to just once a day, then once a week. I started feeling youthful again. I eventually dropped my gym membership and did only yoga. The back spasms faded to just once in a blue moon. I had healed my back through yoga. The practice satisfied my need for a strong workout, but I wasn’t destroying my body in the process.
I figured out that I didn’t have to beat the crap out of myself to accomplish something. I’d always been in a rush to attain my goals by any means necessary, but that approach wasn’t effective in the long run. Not only would I still have made it as far in the NFL by training less, I actually would have gone further. When I learned that I could work hard without harming myself, I began to live with intention instead of ambition. Yoga isn’t just my physical exercise; it’s a spiritual practice that has changed the way I live, increased the compassion with which I relate to others and myself, and has given me a fulfilling, inspiring career. So long, pain in the ass. Hello, asana.
How could yoga make a difference to your life?

Saturday, 12 May 2018

How I Transformed My Life through Better Habits

How I Transformed My Life through Better Habits

better habits
“Men’s natures are alike; it is their habits that separate them.” – Confucius
Life is a funny thing. There is no road map. The best we can do is hope for a strong upbringing, surrounded by a good family and people who care for us. After that, we pray for their love and support as we try to fumble our way through adulthood.
How many of us actually know what they’re doing when they graduate high school? What about college? I sure as hell didn’t.
I grew up as a kid who always succeeded. Every challenge put in front of me I knocked out of the park. As I transitioned out of my parents’ home and into the real world, I felt this enormous amount of pressure to continue succeeding. I realized quickly that I was a small fish in a much bigger pond.
Like so many others, I struggled to adapt to life as a young adult. It was about 7 years ago – I was in college, working part-time, had a mountain of debt, and some health issues that popped up out of seemingly nowhere. I didn’t know it at the time, but later I would be unofficially diagnosed with what can only be described as severe anxiety. That pressure to succeed eventually got to me. As things got harder and harder, the stress kept compounding.
I became best friends with the doctors in my area. I was in their offices every other week either sick or with a new issue that came up.
Now the medical field, in general, is pretty clueless when it comes to mental health disorders. Unless you’ve suffered yourself, it’s damn near impossible to explain what it’s like. Your world feels like it’s falling apart. You’re overwhelmed. And everyone tells you to just “chill out, man.”
Well, I couldn’t. So I took the different drugs prescribed to me over a period of a couple of years, hoping for that magic bullet to make everything better.
Whatever happened to that little boy playing baseball without a care in the world other than what ice cream we were going to get after the game?
Needless to say, I never found that magic bullet. Ironically, only after giving up hope did I finally find some. Modern medicine had failed me, so it was time to take things into my own hands. I started reading. A lot. That led me to start looking at my own behaviors and habits.
Until then, that’s something I never really thought about. I can honestly say that I was on autopilot for the first 20 years of my life. It was no wonder I turned out to be a nervous wreck, I never took a step back and saw how I was living.
When I got to college, I started playing a lot of video games. It was my way to hang out with friends and take a break between classes. I tried to go to the gym here and there, but more often than not, video games were my first choice.
Warning sign number one: I was getting a lot less physical activity and sitting a hell of a lot more.
Also in college, I didn’t have my mother’s home cooking. When provided to choose between cooking my own meal or Taco Bell downstairs, what would any college student do? I’ll have the #4 with extra fire sauce, please.
Warning sign number two: My diet had gone to shit.
Lastly, I never knew what real homework was until my first year of college. I had more to do in one night than two weeks’ worth of high school work. My buddy and I would frequently pull all-nighters, and I never really had a consistent sleep schedule. Energy drinks and caffeine became my new best friends.
Warning sign numbers three and four: My sleep schedule was non-existent, and I never gave myself a chance to relax.
I mentioned I went to the doctor’s a lot. I’d show up with migraines, colds, digestive issues, sore throats, insomnia, you name it. The sad thing? This is what 90% of Americans do. And if you think about it, it’s not a surprise. I’d consider my college habits “average” among the rest of the population. I think many of you would agree.
Simply put, I got tired of feeling like shit. I’m thankful that modern medicine failed me. If it hadn’t, I wouldn’t be where I am today. By taking a step back and evaluating my habits, I was able to transform my health, skyrocket my productivity, and be a happier person.

Here are the 4 ways I was able to completely turn my life around:

I started becoming the type of person who eats healthier.
I started becoming the type of person who exercises regularly.
I started becoming the type of person who meditates and practices mindfulness.
I started becoming the type of person who sleeps on a regular schedule.
That’s it. I put down the pills and starting looking at the things I could do to start changing my life for the better. My reading at the time led me to what are now referred to as keystone habits – behaviors that, if done regularly, have a cascading effect on all other aspects of your life.
I identified the few key things I had to do each day, and then I started scheduling time for myself. When you take care of your body and mind, it rewards you by taking care of you. I focused on one habit at a time and slowly adopted them all as a part of daily routine.
It didn’t take a day or even a week, but after a couple of months, I started feeling a lot better. My anxiety calmed down and I had a whole new arsenal of weapons to throw at it.
Notice how I phrased those 4 ways up above: “I started becoming the type of person who does X.” Not only did I start eating healthier, but I started seeing myself and believing that I was the type of person who eats healthier. This is key in changing habits. I believed I was a new person, and so I was.

Closing thoughts

There is no magic bullet to cure a lifetime of stress and anxiety, it starts with better habits. Unfortunately, this isn’t something you can just tell someone who’s suffering. They’ve got to exhaust their options and fumble through it themselves. Only when they’re ready to help themselves can the rest of us even begin to help them.
If there’s anyone out there who knows a better way, I would love to chat with them. This is something that people need to know about and an epidemic that needs to be solved.
This article is for the millennials out there. If you’re fighting the good fight and struggling to find your place in the world, don’t lose faith. Keep on going. You’ll get there. Sometimes you have to march through hell to find the white pearly gates of heaven.

Friday, 11 May 2018

Don’t Worry, I’m Scared Too

Don’t Worry, I’m Scared Too

scared
“Nothing gives a fearful man more courage than another’s fear.” – Umberto Eco
Growing up I was extremely shy. I didn’t have many friends in elementary and middle school and rarely opened up to anyone. I didn’t even ask my teacher questions in class. I was more than your average introvert, I was scared of the world and the people that lived within its parameters.
As a child I was scared to do anything without my parents mainly because I was afraid that I would screw it up. I was getting good grades and was well behaved, but I wasn’t happy. I had this belief that I was, for some reason, unable to do the things the others kids could do. I felt inadequate.
Elementary school was a nightmare. I would cry as soon as my mom left and would be anxious until she got back. I felt alone even when I was surrounded by kids that considered me their friend.
In middle school I was still just as shy and insecure. Despite going to a small school, I didn’t feel like I had many friends. I had this constant feeling that something was wrong with me. Some nights I would just lay in my room and cry, wondering why I was so miserable all the time.
This type of thinking continued through high school and even into college. I opened up more as I grew older, but the fear didn’t go away. I knew something was wrong with me, but I didn’t know what it was.
While in my second semester of college I stumbled upon some information on the internet about something called social anxiety. Because mental health was not something we discussed much growing up, I didn’t really know much of the disorder. I began to read some of the symptoms and realized that social anxiety was the thing that was hindering me so much.
I continued to do research on the disorder and began to discover more about what causes it. It is common knowledge that people with social anxiety experience nervousness in social situations. What a lot of people don’t know is that one of the main causes of social anxiety is negative thinking. People with the disorder of have a negative perception of themselves and often think that they are ugly or stupid.
I realized what I was truly afraid of: not being good enough. I was afraid that people would look at me and not like what they see. I was scared of rejection.
At an even deeper level, I was afraid to be truly known. I didn’t open up to people because I thought that I wasn’t good enough at a core level. I thought that if people truly knew me, they wouldn’t want to be my friend. I had this great feeling of shame towards who I was. I was deeply afraid that I people would see me as inferior.
To help cope with all of these issues, I began to practice meditation and other mindfulness exercises. I slowly began to change my way of thinking. On one particular day I was sitting in my room letting my mind wonder when I began think about fear itself. I started to ask myself, what if everyone is like me? What if everyone is afraid, maybe just of different thing or in a different way?
I realized that everyone, from star athletes to noble prize winners, experience fear in their lives. Whether people are afraid of heights, planes, spiders, or talking to girls, we all experience anxiety and fear. There is no reason for anyone to feel excluded or inferior because something scares them. People with phobias or anxiety disorders might have “issues” but there is nothing wrong with them as people. They are just as human as everyone else and should not feel any lesser than.
What if fear, the thing we all share in some way, could actually serve to unite us rather than separate us? What if we all came together and admitted that we are afraid? Wouldn’t that be empowering?
Once I realized that everyone was afraid of something, I began to feel less insecure about my anxiety disorder and started to be more open about it. I started to tell my friends about my struggles. I started to realize that there was nothing terribly wrong with me. I had a certain problem, but everyone had problems.
By admitting our fears, we can give each other strength in moments of anxiety. When we see someone else struggling it helps us to realize that we are not worse off than them. It helps us feel like we belong.
Have the courage to open up about our fears. Have the courage to be vulnerable. You will begin to feel liberated and others will be drawn to your courage.

Wednesday, 9 May 2018

Becoming Me: Discovering My True Self After Divorce

Becoming Me: Discovering My True Self After Divorce

true self
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” – E.E. Cummings
Married. That was my place, once before. Every day I fulfilled my role as the loyal and good wife while carrying my little boy on my hip. I thought I had it all; love, health, stability, family, social acceptance and more. On the surface, everything seemed picture perfect. I believed I was living true to myself. But something was not quite right…
Fast forward to February of 2015. The reality bombs dropped hard blowing up my life into millions of pieces. Complete and utter devastation was left behind. Shock and despair consumed my entire body. After years of living in denial, the truth of my failing marriage rose to the surface shattering my world.
Reality struck. My life as a wife was over. The future I had planned in my heart for my husband and our son went up in flames leaving me with the ashes of broken dreams.
Standing knee deep in the wreckage, I climbed out to save myself this crushing reality. Once I could breathe and regain consciousness, I began the arduous task of cleaning up the debris to build a solid foundation for my post-divorce life.
Some might say I was building a new me as a changed woman. But that’s not all true. Yes, the divorce was life changing. My living arrangements changed. My financial situation changed. My perspective on life changed. But I didn’t change…
I was becoming the real me.
During my marriage, I thought I was living true to myself aligned with my soul. But really, I was molded into someone who wasn’t me. I listened to everyone else’s expectations of how I should think and act rather being to true to my own desires, thoughts and actions. Instead of listening to the longing in my heart, I second guessed myself and didn’t believe in my natural abilities.
Ready to heal and revitalize my essence, I worked diligently to clean up the mess and start a new beginning. The more I dug through the rubble, the more I healed, the more my true self began to shine through the cracks.
Although painful, this excavation was necessary. I was on a divine mission digging for gold beneath the shattered pieces of my old self. Layers upon layers of my ego were thrown away one by one. The connection to my authentic self grew stronger creating the pathway to wholeness.
As I reached closer to the bottom, I recognized the person I’ve been hiding all these years. These discoveries gave me the energy, hope and motivation to move forward.
  • I found my passion for writing and started an inspirational blog.
  • I embraced my powers of strength and resilience getting through me the tough times.
  • I realized I’m capable of achieving my goals while taking care of myself.
  • I learned what’s most important by redefining my core values and priorities.
  • I discovered my life purpose of using creative and intuitive gifts of healing to inspire others to live their life and create miracles for themselves.
  • Most of all, I grow closer to God while learning to love myself unconditionally regardless of my circumstances.
Following the crash and burn of my marriage, I had choices. I could have claimed victim living in anger burning everything left behind. I could have lived in denial leaving the wreckage alone. But instead, I chose to heal viewing my wounds as sacred.
My sacred wounds opened my heart allowing the light of my soul to awaken. As my inner beauty was revealed, I persevered and kept digging through the wreckage until I struck gold—my authentic self.
After many days of pain, joy, exhaustion and exhilaration, the rocks from the mass destruction are finally cleared away. All that remains is the gold treasure of my true self once hidden, but now ready to shine. This piece of gold is dusty and needs polishing, but that’s ok. Learning about your true self is an endless journey, for your soul is ever evolving.
Now here I stand with this precious gold before me serving as a solid foundation to build my new life upon. Every brick, mortar, beam and nail will be a reflection of my true self-aligned with my core values, passions and dreams. I don’t know what this building will look like, how tall it will stand, or how many windows it will have. But here’s one thing I know for sure. My new building of life will be tough, strong and beautiful allowing me to become authentically…
Me.

Tuesday, 8 May 2018

Breaking Down a Large Goal into Manageable Chunks

Breaking Down a Large Goal into Manageable Chunks

large goal
“Everybody has their own Mount Everest they were put on this earth to climb.”
– Seth Godin
When I graduated high school, I set a goal for myself: to write a novel.  However, between moving to a new town, trying to find my place on a big campus, and my studies, it seemed an impossible task.  I would start a novel only to abandon it within a few weeks, and when I picked it back up again, I couldn’t remember what I wanted to write about.
It took me several years to figure out a system that helped me finish my goal.  I decided one day that I was going to write 3 pages every day, no matter what.  Breaking the daunting goal of writing a novel into this amount made it easier to tackle, and I finished a rough draft within a year.  I easily wrote the rough draft of another novel this same way.  I felt empowered by how I’d broken down this large goal into daily manageable chunks.
Since then, I have been meaning to revise the second novel into something I could send out to publishers.  But between starting a career, a divorce, and then starting a family with a new person, revising the novel fell by the wayside.  It would be too much work, I reasoned.  I don’t have the time.  And, most importantly, I didn’t have a system in place to make this mountain of work seem reasonable on a daily level.
But in the back of my mind, I knew this was one of those bucket list items I would regret if I didn’t do it.  I’m now a few months into revising the novel, and I feel like I have a system that allows me to make progress every day.  Here’s how I did it:

Step 1: Just Make Time

If you don’t have the time, it’s never going to happen.  So the first thing I did was make sure I had dedicated time during my week to write.  Since I just finished a major consulting project, I decided not to look for new projects so I could use this time to work on the novel instead.

Step 2: Explore Options for Finishing the Task

I had no idea how to approach revising my novel.  So instead of jumping straight into my rough draft, I read a book about the art of good storytelling.  This got me thinking about my story from a new perspective: what things in my story worked and what needed revisions.  From there, I made a list of things that I wanted to tackle to strengthen my story.  Having this list of actionable items, instead of just a vague idea that I wanted to make it better, made it much easier to break down the mountain of work ahead when I started re-reading my draft.

Step 3: Make Daily/Weekly Mini-Goals

If you don’t feel like you’re making progress in the short-term, you may give up your long-term goal.  I decided early on to outline 2 chapters of my novel every day.  This gave me a sense of purpose and moved me closer to my end goal.  Once finished, I collected my outline notes to define more tasks, such as rewriting scenes or modifying characters.  This gives me many more mini-goals to complete without feeling overwhelmed by the remaining workload.

Step 4: Give Yourself Free Time to Explore

If you are embarking on a creative endeavor, you will find yourself needing time that does not necessarily lead to concrete results.  For example, I set aside 15-20 minutes each writing session to free thinking about my novel without looking at my notes or reading the text.  This gives me a chance to explore ideas to strengthen my base novel.  I write ideas down quickly and get back to “meditative mode” for more ideas.  Sometimes these idea-generating sessions lead nowhere, but more often than not, I have an “ah-ha” moment that leads to more tasks.  Give yourself permission to have free time to explore your goal, even if it’s not always productive.

Step 5: Maintain Momentum or Return to Step 1

You will feel it once you’re in the groove and making progress towards your goal.  Do what you can to protect your time and keep moving forward.  When (not if) you get stuck, take a step back and assess how things are.  Are your mini-goals still working?  Is your free time completely unproductive?  There comes a time in the process where you may have to try a different approach to get back on track with your original goal.
It may take me a while, but I’m going to revise this novel.  Share your stories of tackling a monumental life goal below.